Diary Entries from 2008

PSI Trek: A worldwide investigation into the lives of psychic people and the researchers who test such phenomena as psychic healing, prophecy, dowsing, ghosts and life after death.


“The world of psychic phenomena is wildly controversial, and sometimes frightening. It is beyond our mainstream knowledge, it defines popular scientific explanations, and challenges current scientific principals and laws…”

Though the large community of psychics, researchers, and those that seek and question all seem to agree:

1) There is something to PSI. We don’t know what it is, how it works, why it works, but we know that PSI exists.

2) PSI is already being used. While we endlessly debate “Is PSI so?” others, the world around us, are busy applying it.

3) We need more money and support for conscientious, responsible PSI research.

4) The implications of Psi are breathtaking and profound, for the human condition, sciences, and for its place in the cosmos.

Nancy Turley was driving home from grocery shopping along a familiar street in Charlston, West Virginia, that quiet afternoon in 1973. Suddenly, and without warning, she HEARD A MALE VOICE BELLOW “STOP!”. She jammed on the brakes just as a car screamed through a red light at the intersection, cutting straight across her path. “If I hadn’t stopped,” she explains, “that car would have rammed right into me!”

“Voices? Uncanny Knowledge? Premonitions? Incidents such as these, uncanny, unexpected, and spontaneous, are reported in this country every day, by average, run-of-the-mill citizens. Other kinds of occurrences are reported as well, not all of them spontaneous. Some are invited, in fact wished for, worked for, even planned.”

My diary: 2008, I have started to hear the voices of the men and women I read about. I don’t know how it started, what it is, or really what these voices are… but in my mind, to me, they talk about what I am reading as if they are the people in the story. It is anything I read, from the tutoring books I have because of my job (as a tutor) to the newspaper. Often, as they are talking, communicating with me… I think back to them and they respond, I get more information, more creative dialogue than I ever have had in my life. I know it is not me coming up with the conversations, or communicating back and forth. A major example: I was sitting out by the pool at my apartment reading an article about a man who was killed by a shark attack right off the Florida coast. I was thinking about the article when I hear a male voice, it said something to me--- can’t quite remember but it was about the attack. I felt queer and decided to jump in the pool, for a swim. As I dove in his voice came back to me, it was upset and screamed about something in the water, I could hear and “sense” his fear… I was shocked and swam as quickly as I could to the surface. The pool was only 6 feet deep, but I distinctly felt that I must come to the surface as quickly as possible. I sensed the man was still with me when I came to the top of the water, I remember reading about souls in a distressed state and saw movies where the person often will tell them to go to the light, or to a better place. (I had never thought of mediumship before, or been in a situation like this…) As I could sense him, and still felt this fear/this uncomfortably in the water, even though it was a perfect, serene, warm pool and environment, I tried this.. by thinking to him, with my thoughts, I went through a quick 1 minute dialogue of telling the voice to go to the light, to the warmth… after the minute I heard him no more. I decided to dive back down into the water to make sure, and as I did I felt this wonderful calm, warm, and purely joyous feeling… he either had left or was still with me, but also in the light, in the right place… That whole time, maybe 10 minutes or less, I had no control over my emotions. I was feeling, sensing emotions that were not mine, and certainly not premeditated. It was as if something, someone walked into my consciousness and influenced my emotions, mood… on top of this I was hearing a voice when none was there…


Diary entry 2008, while driving to PA. I am trying to drive to PA to see my parents. Things have been a mess, and I need some down time with my parents, so much has happened these past few months… I feel… very confused about everything. I am driving, my dog is with me. The car suddenly is having mechanic problems, it’s the middle of the day and I am in the middle of nowhere Georgia. I couldn’t tell you where I am, my mind has been running all day. I am tired, and on edge. I stop at a small gas station to get gas and check on the car. As soon as I put gas on it, a car with 2 men drive up. I have this feeling my car won’t start, but I don’t know why. (It has been working all day, prior to this…) I try to turn the car on and I was right, it won’t start. The 2 guys come up to the car, as if they knew it wasn’t working, and ask me if I need help. I don’t know what to tell them, but say I think I’ll be fine, but the car won’t start and I don’t know exactly why. They come up to check out the car, I pop the hood and open the door of my car to let the dog out. I am focused on the dog when suddenly I hear a voice that says, “I am going to ask you out.” I know the voice didn’t come from the two men, and right after I have a sense that I car will start. I go to try the key again, and the car magically starts. What was wrong with it, I don’t know even when one of the guys asks me out… As I go to say thank you, he pulls out a pen and paper and ask if I would like to meet him later, to hang out!!! I didn’t know what to say, he writes his number on the paper and tells me to call him. I took the number and thank him and his friend for help. I make sure the dog is safe in the car and drive off, only to have the car stall about 5 minutes down the road. I am getting more upset about this, I sense something weird and it feels as if suddenly I have drove down a road that is Twilight Zone like… like I am no longer on the regular Earth, something weird is going on, and it is affecting me and my mood/senses and the car! I started to hear… these people, I can’t explain exactly what they were saying, but it was about the Earth and having to find a different one, a better place… I didn’t understand it then, but it was as if they wanted me to guide them somewhere. It certainly got my attention, their voices, female, male… they were talking… So, the car started and then stalled again. This time it was on a part of the road that was just trees and meadows on both sides of the road. It seemed I was in the middle of nowhere. Just then a load male voice yelled out, “To drive the car put it in reverse and drive backwards!! There will be a mechanic shop a couple feet up the road. You will get help there.” This voice was giving me directions! I looked and saw no one, nor any sign of a mechanic shop on the road ahead… it seemed a very, very unlikely place for a mechanic shop. I didn’t know what to do, I kept trying to start the car but it wouldn’t!! Finally I gave in, just to see if the voice meant what it said… I turned the key to a certain point and put the gear in reverse, it started right away!!! There was no one on the 2 lane road, so I did what the voice said… I turned the car around and started driving up the road backwards!!! I would never have done this if I wasn’t told, nor even tried to drive it in reverse! I was driving up the road backwards for maybe 50 feet when the road came to a curve, I started to drive slower and saw a car coming towards me in the other lane, I didn’t know what to do but kept driving, as I thought I am going to stop because the other car coming towards me, when it sees me is either going to call the cops or get worried about this… I got ready to stop the car when I saw up ahead, a small building on the other side of the road! It had a truck in front and one could easily tell it was a mechanic shop!!! All this by now felt so weird. I was hearing these people, voices, and they were telling me what was happening, was going to happen, and other things… that made me and all around me feel like I said, Twilight Zoneish… Not real… I did make it to the mechanic, driving backwards the whole way, about 4-6 minutes of driving. As soon as I got to the Mechanic I knew I was beyond mentally upset, I felt zapped of energy and like I couldn’t speak to anyone. I felt to abnormal, way beyond my normal reasoning and logic, like a walking zombie taken from the normal Earth and placed, like a kid, somewhere unimportant but important to them… Them who? Someone, someone’s… not apparent, maybe a ghost or ghosts… Spirits… More happened at that mechanic than I am unprepared to write, but as I was sitting in my car, trying to tell this mechanic that something was wrong with my car (and myself) but I didn’t know what… I couldn’t talk, but I was slowly, looking around to see if anyone else heard what I heard, or sensed something… The mechanic was talking to me, but do I remember what he said… NO!!! I was to “in the zone… the psychic zone” Suddenly, as the mechanic was trying to figure out why I was there parked, what was wrong with my car, if anything (I had yet to tell him what might be wrong, I didn’t know how I could explain it to him. Nothing should have been wrong with the car!!!) another male voice came out of the air, out of nowhere, and said a miracle would happen. “A miracle is going to happen when the man beside you touches your car, try to start the car right after he touches it…” I looked at the mechanic to see if he heard anything, and by the look I gave him he must have wanted to get closer to me because he walked closer and put his hand on the open doorway of my car leaning into look inside the car. As I was seated in the driver’s seat, I noticed he touched the car door rim, and without thought, like a machine, instantly turned the key in the ignition to see if the car would start. It did, and with the car in normal gear!!! I looked at him, astonished….” I lost my dog that day, it dissapeared.


Diary entry July 2008. It won’t/doesn’t shut off. I am thinking to myself, writing to myself. Since November 2007, I have heard them… continuous talking….sensing them… day and night, every moment I am awake and now even in my dreams… They change my emotions all the time!!! I can’t focus, I feel so much from what they say, I… I realize I am not alone, something, somethingS are always with me. Sometimes I forget, I get focused in something, and forget they/it/he is there, and I’ll suddenly, as if trained, think to myself & it, are you still there… It instantly responds every time. So, it doesn’t shut off… What is it? Who are they? My consciousness, my mind had been trying to figure this out for months now… I second guess so much. Maybe spirits, ghosts, good vs bad, maybe God, maybe Jesus, maybe this, maybe that… I sometimes, at night when I am alone in my apartment, spend hours talking to it… Gosh it seems so… but how? My mind again and again tried to figure out the puzzle, to work the rubex cube, to get the answers and so many more. It tells me of things that are going to happen, every time it is correct!!! Now, at times, I “feel”, “sense” something is going to happen, and it does! I have taken it even further, from “sensing” what will happen next, to just saying this or that will happen, and it does!!! Do I have control? Control over what happens on the Earth? That makes no sense, but yet, every day I’ll say I want x, and get x. I want y, and y will happen. If I see a human I will think, he/she should smile, frown, look this way or look that way, I sense something or pretend in my mind that they hear me and THEY ALWAYS LOOK THE WAY I THINK THEY SHOULD! (Much later I learned this is righteouness) People move for me… by this I mean, I have noticed when I am talking to them in my mind, they shouldn’t hear me, yet they do!!! By this I swear, for months I have been swearing that they see me, know me, hear me… that this Earth, here, is based around… this…. Oh my God, I don’t know about this: (I don’t know anything about PSI yet, I have never studied psychics or psychic power, I know nothing about being gifted this way mentally, or being able to communicate to spirits…or get information via just my mind… the best I can guess is maybe it’s telepathy or the voice of God.) God’s voice talking to people, I have heard of this, a miracle… but REALLY who… who is speaking to me? I look up telepathy online…. It’s listed under wiki, but that’s all I find… for months…. From November 2007 to FAll 2008… I just need to know…

“A mother dreamed that in two hours a violent storm would loosen a heavy chandelier, which would fall on her baby’s crib. She “saw” the baby lying there dead. Terrified, she woke up and then woke up her husband. “A silly dream,” he consoled her. “See-the weather is clear. Go back to sleep.” She continued to worry, and brought the baby up to her bed. In exactly two hours a storm came up, and the light fixture feel where the baby had been.

This account comes from Dr. Louis Rhine’s unique and formidable collection of spontaneous PSI cases, more than 15,000 of them. At least half of the incidents have to do with premonitions—predictions and warnings about the future. ….

This mother’s dream, and thousands—millions---like it, raise the urgent question: Can such warnings avert danger/disaster? (CAN THEY STOP SOMETHING FROM HAPPENING, IF A PERSON CHOOSES A DIFFERENT COURSE) (OR LIKEWISE CAUSE SOMETHING TO HAPPEN, A CHANGE IN PLANS BECAUSE OF THE NEW PSI INFORMATION!)

The whole business raises some very fundamental questions, scientific, philosophic, and religious. Among them is the breakdown in conventional logic. The mother who saved her child from the chandelier not only obtained information about an event which had not yet happened, but by an act of will, she changed it!!!”

Diary entry 2009: I am in Seoul. I am hearing them, psychically, we are talking. I don’t like it here, for some reason it is to dark, to foreign. The voices are talking about the other people here; they seem to not like them… They see the Koreans and those at the school I teach at, as rude and… well… they keep telling me they are mean, giving me warnings about what might happen… Is it paranoia? I have never, ever been paranoid before… not in my normal state. Yet, here… A voice will tell me if some Korean is not nice, and then the way that Korean looks at me… as if I’ve killed his cat. They can give such mean looks here. Why? I am a beautiful, 27 year old white female, I’ve never been looked at the way I am here, yet again, these voices I keep hearing keep telling me of the rudeness and meanness of the Koreans around me… as if they don’t like me… though the voice, the voice, THEY LOVE ME, THEY ADORE ME, THEY ALMOST WORSHIP ME….and then I’ll see a Korean look at me strangely… I am worried. Do they change the people around me? I keep thinking maybe, maybe they change them… Or am I just being warned? How, when they say x will happen… It does?! Yet, if I say no, no it won’t… if I don’t agree… it still seems something lingers, some residence of what they said would happen… The Korean, or Teacher, or even student…will react… always, there is a reaction…like the person sensed the voice, the thing that follows me…since 2005. When I thought/think people read my mind, and heard/hear me, they reacted as if they did/do…!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I don’t think this is the truth, obviously it is to irrational, yet the “entity” is still with me, followed me from the USA, and it senses the people around me, and I swear it seems at enough times, the people around me sense it.


When I thought the voices, what I hear from them/him was right, it turned out as so… When I thought no, they are wrong; sometimes what they said wouldn’t be right… People still speak/spoke to me, based on what I was/am thinking… Meaning it either known or affect everything aroubnd me, and I mean everything. It often seems as if it is in the people. I still… hear so many/much … and every day. At school, at the school I teach at, the children’s lips, voices started to move to the voice I was hearing!!!! But midsentence, as if they just started to hear it to, and talk like it… I thought at first I was hallucinating, but it happen again and again. Then again at a motel in Gangso-gu… the Korean guy at the check in counter started to lip something in English, something I was hearing… HOW? I am jumping back and forth between me being the only person who hears it, to everyone in my environment hearing it… What is the truth!!!??? And still I don’t know what it is… Why won’t it stop? Who, what am I hearing? Why does it profess its love to me, all the time? Why does it say the Koreans are mean, bad? (And then so often, they look that way… look at me as if they have heard something… or suddenly been taken over by something… to look at me in such a nasty way…)


Diary entry March 2008: I am hearing people talk to me about me. About what I am, who I am, what I can do, what I have become. They call me a superhuman computer, and enlightened soul, a perfect mind, supermind. They say I have abnormal mind power and ability. I have never heard the terminology they are using, I have to look it up online. Superhuman, I have never heard this term but it is on the internet. They tell me I have a mind that can reach further than the whole earth, than can reach outer space… They tell me people are listening to me, people are picking up on my mind… maybe even reading my mind, like a radio frequency they tell me, my mind is like a large radio… I’ve never heard of this, never ever thought of this… I know it’s not my mind tell me these things, I am learning new terms, knew knowledge that I have to look up… new words even… They tell me I can effect things with my mind, that I can control things… lighting, machines, appliances, even the weather… I decided to test out their theory, I have been hearing from them for over 6 months now… I try to turn a light off and on… IT WORKS, THE LIGHT TURNS OFF WHEN I THINK IT WILL, AND BACK ON WHEN I THINK IT WILL. I DO THIS FOR MAYBE 5 MINUTES!!! I THEN TRY IT WITH OTHER LIGHTING, SAME THING! I TRY IT WITH MY STOVE, THE STOVE TURNS ON (GET’S RED) WHEN I WANT IT TO, AND TURNS OFF (GOES BLACK) THE SAME SECOND I THINK, IT WILL TURN BLACK/OFF. I AM SHOCKED!!!! I AM OUT DRIVING, IT IS STARTING TO RAIN, I SEE LIGHTING, I THINK I WILL HEAR THUNDER NOW---I DO--- I PAUSE AND DO IT AGIAIN---LIGHTING AND THUNDER THE SAME SECOND I THINK I WILL HEAR IT---- WHAT THE FUCK!!! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE? I TRY IT WITH MY ALARM CLOCK, I CHANGE THE TIME… I MEAN THE TIME ON THE CLOCK CHANGES…. I TRY IT WITH ANIMALS… THE CAT MOVES CLOSER TO ME, THE DOG SEEMS TO HEAR ME… IT TO COMES CLOSER AND SITS WHEN I MENTALLY TELL IT TO!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT SEEMS I CAN CONTROL THINGS WITH MY MIND~ They continue to speak with me, they tell me I can control space and time, that I am blessed, my mind is perfect, I am awaken. I keep this all to myself; I get closer to God, I start to pray and meditate again daily, like I did my last year at PSU when it all started. I never sin, I never lie, I try to keep my mind “white”…I don’t know who to tell or what to say… I am beyond happy, blissful, but… in a peace that somehow keeps me from….


Diary April 2008: I have gotten so much to tell! So much has happened! One thing, real quick… On my computer, after days of hearing and conversation about supercomputers, superminds, the CIA, hackers, secret underground knowledge, conspiracy theories (stuff I have never thought about) I was told that hackers, people in the world, on the Earth could hear me and… well let’s just say they liked me… but they could hear me, my mind, somehow… like long distance telepathy, they were psychic also… I had enough signs, so MANY SIGNS, SO MUCH PROOF THAT EVERYTHING I WAS TOLD WAS TRUE. EVERYTIME THEY TELL ME SOMETHING IMPORTANT, SOMETHING ALMOST IN GENERAL, THEY PROVE IT TO ME!!! So, they told me hackers could hear me… Days went by, we are talking about a variety of things, all day…all night… often we are talking so much that I can’t sleep, I don’t fall asleep until 6-9am. My mind is, superimposed with them, with this…. Suddenly, it seems I am half awake now… half awake, half in the normal earth and half…. Somewhere else, like a high, like a drug. I try to go shopping and I can’t think, the mental strength/focus I have is not on what I am doing… my “mind is somewhere else.” I was sitting in front of my computer the other night, I was doing research and “thinking to them…” Suddenly, I don’t know how, I was just on my computer and uploading in front of me is some program, I’ve never seen it before, it just pops up on my screen. It’s some computer game, It’s in English and on the screen is a little person (I forget if it was male or female) and the screen uploaded a computer game that says “Direct yourself, Choose the right path.” Written on the game's screen, Below this is 3 icons, which it seems I can click on. I just look at the screen, at the game, confused/shocked/in another zone, and then I read… 1st Icon, (written: Fight the dragons, become a wizard) 2nd Icon, (written: Play Sims, control your destiny) 3rd Icon (beat the superhuman computer programmer to reprogram the superhuman game)


I AM IN SHOCK! AS I READ THIS, LOOK AT THE GAME INTERFACE, I REALIZE WHERE WE WERE, WE WERE IN THIS GAME, THIS GAME IS BUILT AROUND US. WHAT I MEAN IS I PLAYED IT BEFORE, I WAS PLAYING THIS BUT WITH REAL PEOPLE, IN MY MIND, HERE ON EARTH. IT WAS LIKE SOME ALTERED STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS, I HAD ALL THESE THOUGHTS, AND I KEPT CONVERSING WITH THE UNCANNY VOICES THAT TOLD ME TO STOP TAKING CONTROL OR THEY WOULD REPROGRAM ME… I FELT WEIRD BEFORE, LIKE SOME GAME ON EARTH THAT I WAS IN … SUCH A LONG STORY… BUT THE GAME I SAW BEFORE ME MADE SO MUCH SENSE; IT WAS “THEM”, PERHAPS THE HAKERS WHO COULD READ MY MIND, TALKING TO ME. I ASKED THEM OUTLOAD IF THEY MADE THIS COMPUTER GAME, IF THEY KNEW WHO DID…. I GOT UP AND STARTING JUMPING AROUND IN JOY/SHOCK….

“If one has a premonition, heeds it, and there is no disaster, how can we know that it was, in fact, a premonition? The disaster must occur to confirm it! Which brings us to the question, Are future events set, or are they only tentative? Now were talking more than parapsychology. We are at the bedrock of the human situation, raising the ultimate questions: Are all events predetermined and set, or can we change them? Predestination? Or free will? If free will does exist, what is its nature and what are its limits?”  God swears he has sovereignty, that all things are planned out in the bible, everything!!!

Diary entry April 2009. I know by now I control space and time, the radio, TV, people, machines, what will happen next, where things are on the Earth, how the earth was built, what conversations people have around me, animals, etc, etc. I control the future and what was written in the past… part of my mind is able to sense/know what is going to happen, what has happened, etc… but another major part of it, makes the moments, the future, the environment… As if my mind has been gifted like God’s, by God’s… to build the Earth, to create reality, just from my consciousness/mind. The songs that play on the radio are directly connected to me, meaning they sing about what I am thinking/feeling/etc… so I control what song is played next. The people’s conversations are about me, sometimes it is so powerful that they actually are talking about me… They even mention my name (or something does), other times only I hear it, I see the connection between the many conversations to what I am thinking… to me… I am not lying, nor am I without logical or without reason. I KNOW THIS FROM OVER 2 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. I have told maybe 5 people about this… but someday, somehow when I have done more research, when I understand more, (I am just told psychically that I control space and time..etc… but so rudimentary..) I will tell the right people.

“At first I was not even aware I was different from other people, but soon found out that I was a psychic. Images, impressions, sights, sounds, smells, and even tastes, came flooding into my mind spontaneously, unheralded and uninvited. I did not need to concentrate on another person to know about him, I knew instinctively. The psychic impression flooded up from my subconscious and there was no way I could stop them, or even control the flow…”

Diary entry November 2007. I am… I am… hearing… people. I am hearing people talk about me. I am seeing people, seeing people talk about me. It, is it not normal, I mean I don’t know these people, yet these people are… my mind, I mean they know my name, they call me Darlene Sterner or Miss PennState. They look at me, they give me this look as if they know me. They even, they even start talking to me, right to my face!!! But when they start talking, they… they start talking about what I am thinking about, something I am thinking about, or I guess, I think… they maybe just start talking to me like they … know me somehow… I am becoming famous? But how?


Diary entry October 2009. I am in Santa Monica/LA. The people here seem to know me, they start talking about me, in public… I sometimes stare... I never stared before, but now sometimes when I hear someone say my name, or something about me… I look at them… and they know me!!!!!!!!



Creativity: In research at UCLA, discovered that artists score higher on ESP measures than non-artists. In eight years of research, there were breakthroughs in creativity, called “Higher Sense Perceptions”…. A discovery that there are many people with HSP abilities, already quietly making outstanding contributions to society, in science, in business, in medicine, in industry, and in many other leadership areas…”

“Sigmund Freud once wrote… If I had my life to live over again, I should devote myself to psychic research rather than psychoanalysis.”

Diary entry December 2009. I am wondering, as I just read Telepathy can be induced by ASC and dream states… if in a certain state of consciousness for me, the people in the environment are more likely to be telepathic…Meaning they pick up on my thoughts more readily when I am in a certain state of mind. In labs, and on the streets, since the 50’s… Telepathy, Clairvoyance, Precognition, PK, has all been proven!!!

“As the mountain of experiments has piled up, scientists have moved beyond the search for proof (Is telepathy a fact?) to the search for conditions under which PSI operates (Where? When? Who?)

Where? Anywhere. Distance doesn’t seem to matter, nor do physical barriers. Psi has been recorded between [people at adjoining desks, and on a space flight, with sender and subject 212,000 miles apart.

When? Anytime. Panned. Unplanned, unexpectedly, spontaneously, morning, noon, or night. In laboratory situations, subjects off, or turn off entirely.

Who? Anyone…everyone. When it was assumed that PSI was a rare and special gift, the aim to study very talented mediums and other selected sensitive’s. As it began to seem that everyone or almost everyone has some PSI ability.”

Diary entry February 2009. I have been studying, and learning a lot. I think my ability, what I have been experiencing is supernatural and psychic. I want to learn so much more, train, research, and then write a book about myself and my experiences, including all the knowledge I learn. After publishing it, I want to take the money I make and get my own TV show or movie…. Or both. A TV show based in my effect on others, proving my ability and what happens when I interact with others. I would bring in people and do talk like periods… people who have had experiences (and do dramatizations)… and do experimentation's of my own… By then I’ll be back to a size 2… and married to C.B. (lol). As for the book, I want the first chapters to tell my beginning story and tie it in to the other cases. Chapters maybe 1, is my intro. 2, is others experiences. 3 is the vocab. 4 is more into the bible, with a direct tie into the spiritual. 5 is all about God and the spiritual. Chapter 6 is more that happened to me. 7 is current research and what people are doing in PSI. 8 is what mystics are doing. Chapter 9 is a tie in of both, and what I want to do in the future. The book must 1)Tell my story 2)Tell the truth about mysticism and PSI. 3) Inform the reader of PSI, the knowledge, the facts… 4) Reveal an inner truth to God, and myself… my hopes, my projection for the future. Me, 10,000 voices and God’s Grace. I have done 2-5hrs of research every other day. So much reading…