Take this, learn and understand!!!

I have great news. I have been researching, collaborating, doing experiments, and otherwise scientifically studying consciousness, cosmology, religion & spirituality, mind/mental parapsycology and psychoanalyses. A wide variety of fields and topics, that tie into consciousness, reality, scientific truths and the universe/world that we live in. Yesterday, I found two great articles that I am going to post. I want the reader to understand, via my dissection and discussion of the information in the articles, a main theory I have concerning my studies and research.

‘Biocentrism’: How life creates the universe
Authors say cosmology misses the big picture unless it includes biology

In the past few decades, major puzzles of mainstream science have forced a re-evaluation of the nature of the universe that goes far beyond anything we could have imagined. A more accurate understanding of the world requires that we consider it biologically centered. It’s a simple but amazing concept that Biocentrism attempts to clarify: Life creates the universe, instead of the other way around. Understanding this more fully yields answers to several long-held puzzles. This new model — putting observers firmly into the equation — is called biocentrism. Its necessity is driven in part by the ongoing attempts to create an overarching view, a theory of everything.

Could the long-sought Theory of Everything be merely missing a component that was too close for us to have noticed? Some of the thrill that came with the announcement that the human genome had been mapped or the idea that we are close to understanding the “Big Bang” rests in our innate human desire for completeness and totality. But most of these comprehensive theories fail to take into account one crucial factor: We are creating them. It is the biological creature that fashions the stories, that makes the observations, and that gives names to things. And therein lies the great expanse of our oversight, that science has not confronted the one thing that is at once most familiar and most mysterious — consciousness. As Emerson wrote in “Experience,” an essay that confronted the facile positivism of his age: “We have learned that we do not see directly, but medially, and that we have no means of correcting these colored and distorting lenses which we are, or of computing the amount of their errors. Perhaps these subject-lenses have a creative power; perhaps there are no objects.”

For several centuries, starting roughly with the Renaissance, a single mindset about the construct of the cosmos has dominated scientific thought. This model has brought us untold insights into the nature of the universe, and countless applications that have transformed every aspect of our lives. But this model — failing us now in a myriad of ways — may be reaching the end of its useful life.

The old model proposes that the universe was until rather recently a lifeless collection of particles bouncing against each other, and obeying predetermined rules that were mysterious in their origin. There are many problems with the current paradigm — some obvious, others rarely mentioned but just as fundamental. But the overarching problem involves life, since its initial arising is still a scientifically unknown process. The bigger problem is that life contains consciousness, which, to say the least, is poorly understood.

Consciousness is not just an issue for biologists; it’s a problem for physics. There is nothing in modern physics that explains how a group of molecules in a brain creates consciousness. The beauty of a sunset, the taste of a delicious meal, these are all mysteries to science — which can sometimes pin down where in the brain the sensations arise, but not how and why there is any subjective personal experience to begin with. And, what’s worse, nothing in science can explain how consciousness arose from matter. Our understanding of this most basic phenomenon is virtually nil. Interestingly, most models of physics do not even recognize this as a problem.

But even putting aside the life-and-consciousness issues, the current model leaves much to be desired when it comes to explaining the fundamentals of our universe. The cosmos sprang out of nothingness 13.7 billion years ago, in a titanic event facetiously labeled the Big Bang. We don’t begin to understand where the big bang came from even if we continually tinker with the details. Indeed, every theorist realizes in his bones that you can never get something from nothing, and that the Big Bang is no explanation at all for the origins of everything, but merely, at best, the partial description of a single event in a continuum that is probably timeless.
It’s one thing to acknowledge that theoretical physicists are brilliant people even if they do tend to drip food on themselves at buffets. But at some point, virtually everyone has thought, or at least felt: This really does not work. This does not explain anything fundamental, not really.

Then, too, in the last few decades there has been considerable discussion of a basic paradox in the construction of the universe. Why are the laws of physics exactly balanced for animal life to exist? These fundamental constants of the universe — constants that are not predicted by any theory — all seem to be carefully chosen, often with great precision, to allow for existence of life and consciousness. We have absolutely no reasonable explanation for this.

The bottom-line issue: What is the nature of this thing we call reality, the universe as a whole?

This, consciousness, is not a small item. It is not like anything else. Indeed, it is nothing like anything else. Consciousness is awareness, or perception, which in an utter mystery has somehow arisen from molecules and goo. How did inert, random bits of carbon ever morph into that Japanese guy who always wins the hot dog eating contest?
In short, the attempt to explain the nature of the universe, its origins, its parameters, and what is really going on, requires an understanding of how the observer — our presence — plays a role.

At first this may seem impossibly difficult, since much of awareness or consciousness and certainly its origins are still mysterious. But as we shall see, we can use what we know, and what we are increasingly discovering, to formulate models of the cosmos that make sense of things for the first time.

My notes: So the question is, how did the Cosmo's, the celestial and universe at large come to be? Next, how after it came to be, and from what must be answered, how did life and consciousness come to be? We usually rely on science to tell us our answers, but....

Undeniably it is the biological creature that makes the observations and creates the theories. Our entire education system in all disciplines, the construction of our language, revolve around a bottom-line mindset that assumes a separate universe “out there” into which we have each individually arrived on a very temporary basis.


However, starting in the 1920s, the results of experiments have shown just the opposite. The observer critically influences the outcome. An electron turns out to be both a particle and a wave but how and, more importantly, where such a particle will be located remains dependent upon the very act of observation. This is perhaps most vivid in the famous two-hole experiment, which has been performed so many times, with so many variations, it’s conclusively proven that if one “watches” a subatomic particle or a bit of light pass through slits on a barrier, it behaves like a particle and creates solid-looking hits behind the individual slits on the final barrier that measures the impacts. Like a tiny bullet, it logically passes through one or the other hole. But if the scientists do not observe the trajectory of the particle, then it exhibits the behavior of waves that allow it pass through both holes at the same time.

Meaning: Something observed vs unobserved, the action and event is different based on the observer/it being observed. Many times we discuss how one event can be seen very differently by two people, yet it was the same event. This also applied to science, when something is viewed it seems one way, and when not viewed a completely different event/actions take place. Thus the viewer must have something to do with the event/actions. Would there be any event at all were it not viewed? Or perhaps the same event?

Since then, the list of paradoxes and intractable problems has continued to grow, starting with those accompanying the Big Bang (for instance, how could the entire universe — indeed, the laws of nature themselves — pop out of nothingness?) to experiments during the past decade that show separate particles can influence each other instantaneously over great distances — as if they’re endowed with a kind of ESP.

AhHA! So they have proven that particles, energy, have ESP!!! The ability to communicate from a distance, the ability to affect each other though no "contact" is had. What degree is it to say that our consciousnesses cannot do the same? Effect each other, communicate, via a distance? Something we would have a hard time proving or disproving as there is no matter in consciousness or thought. Probably even, no awareness that one is even communicating or being effected by ESP.

It works with light, too: When born-together pairs of photons are created in a special kind of crystal, observing one member instantly influences the behavior the other — even if they are separated by enormous distances.

They are intimately linked in a manner suggesting there’s no space between them, and no time influencing their behavior.
No time!!! No space!!!
These and similar experiments have befuddled scientists for decades.
So let's think about this. Let's take the seemingly undeniable logic that your kitchen is always present, its contents assuming all their familiar shapes and colors whether or not you are in it. The earth, your road, your home, is built and can be even seen from space, with the same likeness again and again. It must be concrete matter, right?
Wrong!!!!
Consider: The shapes, colors, and forms known as your kitchen are seen as they are solely because photons of light from the overhead bulb bounce off the various objects and then interact with your brain through a complex set of retinal and neural intermediaries. But on its own, light does not have any color, nor any brightness, nor any visual characteristics at all. It’s merely an electrical and magnetic phenomenon. So while you may think that the kitchen as you remember it was “there” in your absence, the unquestionable reality is that nothing remotely resembling what you can imagine could be present when a consciousness is not interacting.


Quantum physics comes to a similar conclusion. At night you click off the lights and leave for the bedroom. Of course the kitchen is there, unseen, all through the night. Right?
WRONG!
But, in fact, the refrigerator, stove and everything else are composed of a shimmering swarm of matter/energy. The results of quantum physics, such as the two-slit experiment, tell us that not a single one of those subatomic particles actually occupies a definite place.
The fridge and all concrete matter's actually makeup, is of tiny atoms, tiny particles that float in space. Our mind is programmed to "see" the fridge as a closed object, when in fact it, nor anything else made up of matter is!!!
Rather, the particles exist as a range of possibilities — as waves of probability — as the German physicist Max Born demonstrated back in 1926. They are statistical predictions — nothing but a likely outcome. In fact, outside of that idea, nothing is there! If they are not being observed, they cannot be thought of as having any real existence — either duration or a position in space. It is only in the presence of an observer — that is, when you go back in to get a drink of water — that the mind sets the scaffolding of these particles in place. Until it actually lays down the threads (somewhere in the haze of probabilities that represent the object’s range of possible values) they cannot be thought of as being either here or there, or having an actual position, a physical reality.

Indeed, it is here that biocentrism suggests a very different view of reality. Most people, in and out of the sciences, imagine the external world to exist on its own, with an appearance that more-or-less resembles what we ourselves see. Human or animal eyes, according to this view, are merely clear windows that accurately let in the world. If our personal window ceases to exist, as in death, or is painted black and opaque, as in blindness, that does not in any way alter the continued existence of the external reality or its supposed “actual” appearance. A tree is still there, the moon still shines, whether or not we are cognizing them. They have an independent existence. True, a dog may see an autumn maple solely in shades of gray, and an eagle may perceive much greater detail among its leaves, but most creatures basically apprehend the same visually real object, which persists even if no eyes were upon it.

This “Is it really there?” issue is ancient, and of course predates biocentrism. Biocentrism, however, explains why one view and not the other may be correct. The converse is equally true: Once one fully understands that there is no independent external universe outside of biological existence, the rest more or less falls into place.
So, with biocentrism, it is the viewer and his/her consciousness that creates this reality, the universe, and all that is it in. It is because of our ability to "see" and perceive, to know and consciously be aware of space, time, matter, etc... that creates this place that we know as the kitchen, the street, the town, the earth, outterspace and the universe. Our consciousness creates it, not the other way around of it being here for millions of years and creating us!!!!!


So, Where is the universe?And exactly where is that fridge? Where is the universe even located? Start with everything that is currently being perceived — the page you are looking at, for example. Language and custom say that it all lies outside us in the external world. Yet we’ve already seen that nothing can be perceived that is not already interacting with our consciousness. Since the perceived images are experientially real and not imaginary, it must be physically happening in some location. Human physiology texts answer this without ambiguity. Although the eye and retina gather photons that deliver their payloads of bits of the electromagnetic force, these are channeled through heavy-duty cables straight back until the actual perception of images themselves physically occur in the back of the brain, augmented by other nearby locations, in special sections that are as vast and labyrinthine as the hallways of the Milky Way. This, according to human physiology texts, is where the actual colors, shapes, and movement “happen.” This is where they are perceived or cognized.

If you try to consciously access that luminous, energy-filled, visual part of the brain, it’s easy. You’re already effortlessly perceiving it with every glance you take. Custom says that what we see is “out there,” outside ourselves, and such a viewpoint is fine and necessary in terms of language and utility, as in “please pass the butter that’s over there.” But make no mistake: The butter itself exists only within the mind. It is the only place visual (and tactile and olfactory) images are perceived and hence located. Explained in the language of biology, the brain turns impulses from our senses into an order and a sequence. As photons of light bounce off the butter, various combinations of wavelengths enter our eye and deliver the force to trillions of atoms arranged into an exquisite design of cells that rapidly fire in permutations too vast for any computer to calculate. Then, in the brain, this information, which as we previously saw has no color by itself, appears as a yellow block of butter. Even its smell and texture are experienced in the mind alone. The “butter” is not “out there” except by the convention of language. The same is true for all perceived objects, including the brain, cells, and even the electromagnetic events we detect with our instruments.


Some may imagine that there are two worlds, one “out there” and a separate one inside the skull. But the “two worlds” model is a myth. As we have seen, only one visual reality is extant; it is the one that requires consciousness in order to manifest. As Nobel physicist John Wheeler once said, “No phenomenon is a real phenomenon until it is an observed phenomenon.”

So, with what they have learned, consciousness again creates this reality. It does not exhist outside the mind. It is the mind and all it's biological parts that show us a physical visual sensatory world to interact with, when in fact, no such world is there. Thus, when one looses consciousness---true death would happen. No world we exist for the organism to interact with, which is why all organic, even some inorganic, organisms have consciousness; and that after "death" on this earth most psychics say a person continues to live consciously, with their consciousness.



In 1964, Irish physicist John Bell proposed an experiment that could show if separate particles can influence each other instantaneously over great distances. First it is necessary to create two bits of matter or light that share the same “wave function” using a special kind of crystal (so-called “entangled particles”). Now, since quantum theory tells us that everything in nature has a particle nature and a wave nature, and that the object’s behavior exists only as probabilities, no small object actually assumes a particular place or motion until its “wave function” collapses. What accomplishes this collapse? Messing with it in any way. Hitting it with a bit of light in order to “take its picture” would instantly do the job. But it became increasingly clear that any possible way the experimenter could “take a look” at the object would collapse the wave function. As more sophisticated experiments were devised it became obvious that mere knowledge in the experimenter’s mind is sufficient to cause the wave function to collapse.
That was freaky, but it got worse. If the wave function of an entangled particle collapses, so will the other’s — even if they are separated by the width of the universe. This means that if one particle is observed to have an “up spin” the act of observation causes the other to instantly go from being a mere probability wave to an actual particle with the opposite spin. They are intimately linked, and in a way that acts as if there’s no space between them, and no time influencing their behavior. Experiments from 1997 to 2007 have shown that this is indeed the case, as if tiny objects created together are endowed with a kind of ESP. And that the entities we observe are floating in a field — a field of mind, biocentrism maintains — that is not limited by the external spacetime Einstein theorized a century ago. Thanks to Einstein’s demonstrations that no “information” can travel faster than light, it was assumed that if observers are sufficiently far apart, a measurement by one has no effect on the measurement by the other.
Theories that are now finished for keeps.


OK. A lot of information. I know. But we must dissect this, and pin down the main points. So, we've learned about consciousness and reality, even the existance of matter, material objects in our environment, and how they exist because of our consciousness. What was next, is ESP, and how particles, the make up of everything in the universe, can communicate across huge distances. How they are effect by us, the viewer, and each other, even if one is in one universe and another in another universe!!! What is after that is experiments and studies that have proven that time and space can and is transcended, passed by, in this reality. That neither time nor space matter when it comes to information communicated or cause and effect. See, imagine, as if this whole world was in your mind!!! Your mind held everything, the whole cosmo's, and thus anything that exhisted was not independent, but rather connected wholy on your one mental plane!!! All time and space would be traversable, information would be able to pass through anything, and everything would be effected by your mind, or consciousness at large!!! This totally ties into the theory of a mind at large, one unconscious database that all human's share, and the ability to have parapsycology powers such as ESP, telepathy, telekenesis, etc!!!! Even time travel would be totally plausible, because your mind already has everything from the past and future connected, this one place holds multiple space and time is irrelevant. Sort to speak...

More about me

In reading my blog, to understand what I am, who I am, what I do and what my reality shares with me, I realized my readers must know more detailed facts. I have the time to spend on explaining, and detailing my "isness", myself, my current situation.

For starters, let's describe what a mystic is: by Webster's def, a mystic is a person who with deep, personal, profound connection with God transcends his or her consciousness and reality, to open up a new reality, a new environment that is directly affected by the personal relationship one has made with the divine. Mystics have been around since B.C., perhaps the first, who I do not know, was made around Roman/Greek time, when philosophers as well as scientists, still looked to the heavens for answers. These men, who created a mystical connection with the unseen, were guided to new answers, new explanations, new facts and "news" that was then shared with the greater population. Much of what we know about psychics, divinationers, wizards, fortune tellers, oracles, and otherwise sensual gifted men and women; details the nature of mystics, and their ability to know what is mostly unknown via powers that have been granted to them by God. We have had these titles, and known of the powers of certain visionaries, for centuries; some made popular by their gifts (like Nostradamus) other's by their tongue (like prophets). I wrote before, in another blog, the difference between a psychic and a prophet, however a similarity is often the connection they both have with the unseen, sometimes in both cases a deeply spiritual connection is made, and proves to be the foundation of why they can do what they do.

I am indeed a mystic, for my connection with God and the divine, is the foundation and honest answer for me and my abilities. While I do not prophetize, nor (in all honesty) tell others that I have the ability to know what will happen to the world or specific people in the future, my gift of precognition is already apparent. I am precognant, meaning, often enough I will know of something before it happens. Precognition is apparent in many ways, the masses are unschooled on what it is, how it happens, how one gets the information, who is the sender, and what we do with the information once gotten; so me saying to you that I am precognant, actually opens another room that really needs described and explained in detail. I will note, that room is a room of God. God has always had the power to know the future, and in the bible we are told he knows :"the beginning and the end." He is totally precongnant, from his shared gift, I believe, humans on this earth also have the ability to know and see, what lies before...

I will not go into much more detail at this point, but if one is reading my posts, they shall someday, all come together to show a picture of what it is like to be precognant, and how I use it. Let me add that I do have this ability and use frequently; from knowing what the person beside me will say next to what will happen next in our world. I still have not sat down and exercised my ability, nor ever tried to read anther's fortune or future. I realized I have a hard enough time reading my own future. I do not know how this gift might be of the greatest benefit, but I hope that as I grow (both by my experiences and awareness) solutions and answers will be found. It is an amazing thing to know exactly why a person just said what they did, having known of something seconds before that led them to that sentence or those words he/she spoke. It is an amazing gift to know who will win a game, or who will be chosen for a position, before your other senses would tell you. (I knew Obama would win the presidency, months before he even ran.) (I knew who would win the Masters, who would win the Stanley Cup this year, who would be the next apprentice: Joan Rivers.) These examples are, I'm sure to some, comical--- I must say if something out there greater beckoned for me to use my power to know the next catastrophe, or war.. I certainly would spend time and energy on trying to find the answer. It simple has not be requested, and again in honestly, I mostly do not try to use this ability as an answer for everything or all I want to know. I still want to know many things that are a part of my future. For now, I am unaware of many of my own future events, though maybe more aware of my destiny (and I know I have one) than other's, as well as certain events that will happen, be it through information I got via dreams or even mental visions. (More on that later...) Mostly, if I get an awareness of the future, it is because I am in the scene, and as "the movie plays" I am made aware of the next seconds before the norm. An example may be me out in public, when I hear/think of something, like a book. The person close to me with say (without me knowing they would) I want to buy this new book, "***". Another example, I will be out with a friend, and I'll think of a word, the person I am with will then say the word I am thinking, or will connect it to what he/she says. Apple---"I want to eat and apple", or, "I want some fruit." I have, maybe, hundreds of examples that have happened in my life... One day I'll just write them down. I'm actually planning on purchasing the Iphone so I can use the phone recording app when I am out.

I was watching "Angels and Demons" yesterday, I had experienced while watching the movie both precognition and synchronicity. I won't go into any more detail right now, but if your interested, their is a lot of information on precognition. Also, most physics claim to be very gifted in this area, (probably how they can tell your fortune, or events that will happen in your life) and I suggest you talk to one. What do you have to lose?

Another I am, is I am very skilled at mental communication, mind reading or thought transference. This is something only a few percentage of people truly believe in, studies have been done across the globe and so far no scientist has (without doubt or skepticism) proven that we as humans have this ability--- and can use it without failure. I want to note here, that "to use it without failure" is a very important point. I have been researching, sometimes as a skeptic, what I mention in this blog~ as I am a rational, logical person by mind, if something happens that I cannot explain I often forget about it, or push it aside... hoping that an explanation will come, even if it takes years. Much has happened in people's lives, including my own, that is still unexplainable. From UFOs to spirit visits, mind reading to time travel,... we are still at a loss for answers to our interrogatives. I found out while studying ESP/telepathy/parapsychology; that the CIA funded a over 100 million dollar research program to study these areas of the mind. Of course the people who participated were put through the most rigorous, controlled testing and analyzation. The CIA, other intelligence organizations, have done experiments, from what I've found, all were done with protocol similar to what we use in researching chemistry, biology, physics, etc. It seems, the CIA decided, that if the claimed ability of telepathics, mind readers, psychics, etc is true--- then the only way to prove it, is by adhering it to the same laws of nature, of other sciences, proving it in a controlled lab with reasoning that demands high accuracy and high expectations. I must say that in my mind, what sciences like biology and chemistry have is the ability to recreate to exactness the same organic or inorganic matter, without flaw or any chance for error. Natural sciences recreate cloned replicas so that the Cosmo's is rather un-viol tile. Alongside these sciences, intelligence organizations, think they can put parapsychology and the mind readers, telepathics, psychics, etc of the world. Asking them to replicate, produce, and extract their abilities within the laws and boundaries of their bedfellow sciences. One question, I would like to ask such people, is do you not notice that no telepathic or psychic is created exactly the same? Their similarities may be large or small, and thus their ability to recreate in likeness to biology, or extract information, as done in mathematics is not as probable. We are testing men and women here, what task can be done by a human, that a science cannot do better? Overall the demands put upon science, I believe, cannot be the same demands put upon a psychic or telepathic. None the less, that is what so often, researchers, and program's that the CIA funded in the 1970's, tried and try to do. Not surprisingly, they found conclusively, error in the participants, with a much lower percentage of success. The exact proof, high replicable success that they had in the other sciences, were not matched by those who claimed to have parapsycological power. Thus they returned to the masses with the answer that all evidence proves conclusively, that no definable proof has been acquired. Do these "powers" exist, perhaps, among a small percentage of people, but without the desired results, no "sane" and rational scientists of the 20th or 21s century would back up a claimed person, persons with such ability. Why rely on someone with these gifts, when one could use another science to replicate the right answer more often? Thus the skeptics of the world "won" and all those who have these abilities were sent packing to "prove it to them first", before you come to "true science", if you come to them at all.

What a shock! I ask the reader to role play for a second, just to really acquire the understanding of this situation, which is the reality of this world for all those who have these mental abilities, or even believe in them. Let's say you are a normal, logical, person... and one day you have an event happen, that for you is unexplainable. You are out walking with your child, and as you often do, you talk the sidewalks whenever possible so that the threat of danger to you or him in less likely. While walking, you decided for no apparent reason, to cross the street and walk on the other side of the road, (we often call this changing things up a bit, or trying something new). Now we would have to add statistics in here, the percentage of times you walked your normal route, v.s. the percentage you varied. Let's say 98% of time you and your child took the same walk. Right after you decided to cross the street, an oncoming car veers off the road and onto the sidewalk where you would have been standing/walking surely either hitting you or your child, or coming damn close.

What would you think about this situation?

What is the chance that you would think, "Oh, I am precognitive" ----knowing beforehand that something bad/wrong was about to happen and so thus adjusted yourself physically, so that you nor your child would be injured.
What is the chance that you would not know how you saved yourself and your child? No definable answer.

If something like this happens once, as is does FOR EVERY Human ALIVE--AT LEAST ONCE-- We usually say, wow, God must have been watching, or the Lord blessed me today. If not religious, a person might say, what luck, or what are the chances? Telling all their friends, what had happened, and how it was unexplainable that you chose to cross the street when you did.

Now, if you spoke to a member of the parapsychology board, yes they have many committees, they would answer you just as a true scientist, with a definite proven answer.... Precognition. Instinct. It is in our instinct to have a 6th sense, a 6th sense that can do such things, if heightened and used at full capacity, would put us at a superhuman quality or state.

Now, for just a little longer, imagine that you are a person that has this ability everyday, every week, every month, every year. Not just being able to do this once, but hundreds or thousands of times in your lifetime. To just know the next second, both in your life and maybe even in others. Some call it a hunch, but after having "them" again and again, and "them" turning out to be RIGHT!!--- you know honestly, with all rationality and logic, that you have the ability to know something without getting the information from the usual other 5 senses of sight, hearing, touch, taste or feeling. Perhaps your so "amazed, shocked, confused, thrilled, etc" by this ability, that you do some research--- only to find two major facts. The first, we have the answers. We know what your experiencing. We have names for what your feeling, what your doing, what is happening to you. Their are committees and groups. Schools and centers. Online you may find some great information and detailed answers, for your many questions. Blogs even online, like this one, that explain what your going through or what your experiencing. Great!!!

The second fact, however, is not so great. Just as your find that opened door and walk into a room where these questions are answered, you find that the next door, the next room which you so direly want to walk into, is locked, barred, sealed up and chained. The scientists, skeptics and "rational thinkers" of this world have taken control, and used their power to inform the masses that any such person who believes or takes the room your in a serious, as a path, shall be turned away and told the "truth." That no such ability is honest, that no such gift exists, that the history and study done by "them that know", say that it's all lies, the mind has no such ability and any who say they can or do, are false. One step closer to that door, and you realize with shock, that you have no answers, you have no ground to stand on and the only way to go from here is either a mental institute, a neurological center, or a group created on meetup.com that has "like minded people" who can talk with you.... The media has fed and fed the populous so much deemed reality, answering all the questions of " is it possible?" with no's, and pushing aside those that have experienced or say they can to either the room you were in, or the one where the only comfort you get is from a blanket of acceptance without further help. Yes, some accept, but if you were the person with the child---who just saved both your lives, would you not want to know how? How did I??? Or, like me, a person who does this more often than they would desire, a person who has experienced enough unexplainable events to write 4 books, would you not want the truth? Want to know how, and why, and what, and who, and when, and where, and so many other answers, so much more--- I do not have a child, but I love myself as if I am my own; the first door was unbelievable, I learned and still can learn so much through reading; but the second door is hell. The second door makes it so I cannot share this with a stranger, so that I cannot go to any scientist of posture and status, and tell my story and ask for more answers. I want a grant to fund research on myself and others, I want a school where I can study this and what I have experienced and what others have experienced. (A Parapsycology Masters is no longer offered in the USA) I want the media to show it on TV, I want the papers to write about it, I want it to be out, in the open, and discussed and finally known---- the TRUTH! I am left with books, and online webpages. With TV shows that touch upon it as SciFi or fantasy. I am left with a movie--- that ends way to quick. So many of us are.... dispersed and disheartened, just because the other sciences, prove things exist one way---and to be able to prove they might indeed not, or actually exist in another way as well---is not accepted. I am thus left to find my own answers, to matrix my reality and the scenes I have played in, so that I may be, in some cases and on most days, with ability to explain it/this.

So mental mind reading, telepathy, ESP, mind pushing, thought transference, telekinesis, mind control. Look it up. Research. Read. Asking for more, right now, is having a cup that will be unfilled.

WOW===great show!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Listener_(TV_series)


Well, it's been some time, and as I wrote before, I have decided to write more in hopes of "getting out" more of my book. I was reading Hemingway, the books sort of an autobiography. He talks of his writing technique and schedule, how often he writes and to what length is each session. This gave me motivation, as I write more and more, the flow of what I want to say, to convey, should come easier.

So, I do actually have something to say. I was just watching the new TV series, THE LISTENER. I saw commercials for it, and my interest was peaked. I mentioned before how new TV shows have been popping up that deeply touch on me, what I do, what I can do, what I deal with, who I am... my story more or less. It's very weird, when your a person abnormally gifted like this, and suddenly they have all these popular new TV shows coming out that talk about your gifts, even create stories around people who do what you can. The people all are mentally gifted, but to create an even more intense story, they usually spend their time fighting crime, or solving otherwise unsolvable crimes.

So this new show, follows a kid, my age, who is Telepathic!! He has telepathy, gets mental visions, has a great power of ESP and while working as an EMT helps solve crimes that would of course be almost impossible to solve otherwise. I was completely shocked, while watching the show for the first time, I saw myself, my mind, my life, my daily existence play before my eyes as the main character!!!! The chance to see yourself as another, the situations you live in, especially as someone who has ESP, telepathy, mental powers that mostly are unknown, and unexplained is unprecedented. Such a remarkable moment in my life!!!! I am (in certain states--) like him!!! I live my life like him, well except for the crime fighting. Adding to my excitement was the fact it seemed a part of my destiny to see it. See, I did hear of the TV show, but had errands to run and thought perhaps I missed it's airing tnt. I was thinking about it while at the gym, but didn't see it on any of the preset tv's. While I was sitting down for dinner, thinking the show already had been on, it so happen that the channel the TV was set to, was the same channel it was shown on, and the time I decided to sit down for dinner, was the exact time it started.

Then, during the show, he had to tell a friend that he was telepathic, at that point his friend didn't know, and just though maybe the dude was having a psychological problem. HOW hard this is for us to explain to someone who knows nothing about it!!! Nothing about telepathy, mentalism, ESP, time travel, mind control, telekinesis, psychic abilities, etc. For the normal person these things, these powers are either make believe, or for people in lab coats/the CIA. We don't usually deal with people who have these powers, and I am in no rush to tell my next door neighbor or the stranger on my street, lest I get "The look." I still haven't told anyone, at least, no more than a handful. I was so happy to see that his friend did accept the news, once he proved it to him. :)

I am so happy right now!!! His ability to read peoples minds, completely helped me by acknowledging my ability to do the same, while allowing me to see someone who does this and still lives as a normal human. He understood his ability and used it to benefit himself and others. I now have someone to watch, and can go outside and understand what I hear/see much better!!! Oh, thank you GOD!!!

I did have something happen the other day that was, for me, exciting. I was sitting in my back yard and looked over to the neighbors yard across the street. Maybe 50 feet away from where I was sitting, was a young girl, about 7 or 8, playing with a willow trees long branches. She would grasp them, jump up, and swing in the air. I smiled and thought, how nice and fun that would be. It seemed, just as I thought it, that she had heard me and responded by saying, "Yes, she was having fun." I realized this and continued to "think" to her, wondering why she said that she was having fun out load to no one. No one else was in the yard and as I watched, thought and listened I realized she was indeed talking out load, to what she thought was an invisible friend or person, just as kids that age do. Remember how when we were kids, so many of us had invisible friends that we would talk to... Well I continued to mentally talk to her, and she would respond out load, but not to me, rather just as comments that were made out load, as if someone was listening but no one she knew. SHE WAS A PSYCHIC, had psychic ability, and probably never knew it!!! She certainly didn't know I was there across the street just listening and thinking to her. I was amazed. I have talked to children before, (I mean they have read my mind,) that's a long story... but to see a small child who had such an ability was exciting. I have yet to note how many people I meet that have the mind abilities I mentioned, though I will be taking more note now that I am settled and have the time to do so....

Well, good luck to all those out there who think they have such abilities. I am excited about these new TV shows!!! Something must be happening that pushes us to create these shows!!! Maybe they are receiving information about me... (I have many theories about this...) They all certainly tie in my life!!!

Bless us all!!!

Who I am...

I was thinking if I had to explain myself to another human, what would I tell them? How would my simple words accurately describe me, and any complexity that I have. Well, it seemed, as I thought to myself, with the help of my very profound, psychical gifted, mystical mind such a pleasant and purposeful objective, that I decided to write down my thoughts, the answer to "Who am I."

1) She is a women, very sensual, sexual, a women's heart, a women's characteristics. Very romantic and passionate about love, nurturing, truly compassionate at all times, affectionate, etc.
2) She is kindhearted, very loved and loving. Truly generous with her thoughts and self. Very good.
3) She is spiritual. A true believer, a true mystic, Patience with the truth and her understanding of this place. She relies on God, has promised unending servitude to Jesus Christ. She is innately spiritual. She seeks spirituality and truths, even if unknown.
4) She is a clean person. Especially her body, her mouth, her thoughts. She wants to be healthy, and so far hasn't had any notable illnesses. She hasn't been with physically ill in years. She always has her health, and cares about her beauty.
5) She loves her youth. She tries to stay young, sometimes very playful like a kid. She loves her innocence. Something she will not give up. Will act and keep life simple and unimportant, stress-free like a child.
6) She tries to adapt, quite adaptive. At least when it gives her pleasure, and it doesn't harm to change. She will give much time and energy to those she cares about, if they wish. She will choose to change them a bit and herself change for them, but only if the change she sees as a benefit. By adaptive, I mean she will change her personality or characteristics for fun, she will become someone else (different ego) or will let go of routine and do different.
7) She has high ethics, or by her understanding of them they would be more like morals. She will not sin. She has true beliefs, principals that she most cert. will not lesson. Though she wants room to grow so she might change her views on what is right vs wrong, she still is unsure of what exactly she values, and does not like to state her viewpoint on ethically challenging problems. More of free choice vs set answers, esp for others.
8) She will most likely keep her promises. Is trustworthy, but specifically, and cares about her intent. She won't want to wrong another person, though she doesn't always think about others inner intentions, fears, worries, or doubts. She tries to shun that and put on a happy face, but leaves the door open for the other person to explain what they are trusting her with... if detailed she can be very trusted to do the right thing. She doesn't break laws, or seek others who do. She will always try to comfort another, and show that she is trustworthy and good.
9) She is willing to sacrifice herself for others, though doesn't seek that opportunity, rather the win/win situations in life, which she believes are plentiful.
10) She directs her thoughts inward, to challenge herself and make sure she stays on top spiritually. Yet, she still manges to stay very engaged or to engage her environment. She often feels she engages her environment, that her presence is felt, though maybe not in a noteworthy way.
11) She can handle different places and situations. She doesn't mind change. She welcomes it.
12) She is willing to try something new, in facts likes the newness. She likes to be adventurous, and the challenge that comes from foreign. She seeks opportunities to do something she has not done, though if never done before she probably wouldn't think of it, except for the special profound case of her job---her mysticism.
13) She likes to learn by doing.
14) She likes to educate others, and be educated. She likes to be in a learning environment. Though she is hardly ever in the mood for straight memorization, that is not how she learns.
15) She is not very factual more feels or gets the whole picture.
16) She is open, not to regret, but to believe, to understand, to share. She is also very honest.
17) She is hopeful, optimistic. She always shares positive energy and is most likely in a good mood. She always tries to stay easy going/pleasurable to others, to help that way in social situations. She does not like to complain.
18) She does not want to harm, anything. She has never had a cruel intention. Rather she wants to help, be a important part of a system.
19) She is mental, positive but can be very reproachful if something is done wrong or in a bad way. She gets determined, and will go get what she wants. She sets goals and achieves them, though can go periods without setting many goals.
20) She falls in love. She has no fear of loving or being loved. Very normal socially and in relationships. She plays the peer, but adjusts to him.
21) She judges herself more harshly and more often than others, but only for moments. She is not really judgemental. She tries not to judge, though can and does-- then tries to help make it better.
22) She never gets bored, she finds there is much to do in life, and many things engage her. Life will not pass her by... It will never get boring.
23) She is mental, and uses her mind in wild, playful, sometimes serious ways. She is engaged by her mind, she tries to lead and tries to follow it. It amazes her, the mind, esp hers. She must be mental.
24) She is rational, yet un-skeptical. She realizes their is more out there than spoken about, or made into popular fact.
25) She will lead and will follow. She leads herself and is never afraid to do something alone. She is independent, likes her own mysterious and uniqueness; though frightened of going it to alone.
26) She is a lover not a fighter, a pacifist. A believer of a noble good that maybe shown.
27) She takes pride in herself, she is not resentful.
28) She is courageous, on days, and will show courage in the right moments.
29) Nothing is to beneath her, we are all human or living and hopefully similar in gifts.
30) She loves being part of the attention, really enjoys being under the spotlight if made to feel comfortable while the attention is shown. She doesn't mind public eye or inquiries done in public. She really has nothing to hide.
31) She doesn't like certain things, traits, social injustices, hatred or wrong doing. She really dislikes the wrong, or bad, or wicked. She doesn't understand them and their actions. One must act upright, and proper esp. in certain social situations.
32) She can live without luxuries, both social and material. Though to do so she won't commit to them. She'll break free and join a more popular mainstream crowd. She is not materialistic though she likes comfort. She likes comfort a lot, though is easily pleased and comforted.
33) She uses all her senses, to completion.
34) She loves the outdoors and the cities. Find pleasure in what she does or is doing. Often she pleases herself, get great pleasure from herself, maybe more than others, except that she loves humanity and follows them.
35) She puts great trust and hope in humanity. She prays for their future, and wants to truly help the earth. She tries to live green, and hopes to make a better mark.
36) She is financially sound. She will save and plan for the future or for others, rather than waste her money. She won't buy into image or identity, she could care less for spending money on the name or image. She just goes for what she likes, and what she likes is usually free or cost less.
37) She loves anything living, and machines and technology. She feels, is emotive but not overly. She is not that sensitive, but still is moved deeply by others pain or rejection. She cares what others think because she wants to impress, she want acceptance.
38) She is giving, likes to give... tries to take away her own self interest, and show Altruism in that way.
39) She pays her way, notes the great human mind's. Is very aware of consciousness.
40) Often feels very important, very made aware of, thought about, talked about, felt in society because of her experiences/mystically.
41) She has a true desire to be perfect. Both in mind, body, and soul. Though she might be to self-sabotaging and uneducated on how to achieve such a thing--perhaps her environment had not given way to such a task---but once... Once in her life it did happen. She was self perfect, and to show, she now has her glory---
42) She has great confidence, knows her wants and checks them, is driven when she wants. She tries to be balanced in many ways!!! (driven/easy going, outgoing/introverted, thinker/doer)
43) She seeks true wisdom over many other thoughts, ways to live.
44) She is not inclined in math or sciences. More right brained than left!!!

June~ What's going on...

Today's Bible Reading
John 1:1-18
The Word Became Flesh (Gen 1.1—2.4a) In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God


I know I want to write a book. I know I have wanted to write a book since I was 10 or 11 years old. I started writing around then, for years it was a daily thing, anything from poetry, journal writing--deep profound self searching and awareness, to fictional short stories, even plays. I, of course, had people read my works now and then, the compliments were certainly their, and I remember at one point having my apt. in college decorated with 20 or so of my poems. I have actually lost a large amount of my writing due to computer crashes, something I don't like to think about that often because of the disappointment it carries AND brings. When I was in college I made a 5 year goal dysentery, then a 10, 15, and 20. I believe the actually dysentery got lost with all the other files on my hard drive when my computer crashed in '05. However, I still review the contents, stuck permanently in my mind, now and then. One of the 15 year goals was the writing and publishing of my book. So when achieved, I would be about 40 yrs old. I am now 28. I realize I have time to write, time to think and digress all that I must put on paper and send to the masses.

Before, when I realized I loved writing and felt a strong need to express myself this way, I hadn't known what exactly my book, if I only wrote and published one, would be about. Would it be fiction, or poetry, maybe a social commentary self help piece, what about a prose with heartful autobiographical injections? I wrote in to many genre's to decide, at least then. Now, since my life has developed with the experiences I have had, I can comfortably say I have my book. The topic, the theme, the ideas and stories... The whole book, in fact, can be easily written, filling hundreds of pages, just from what took place between 2005-2009.

It's a mark that I am feeling, this mark that sets me apart from the average, pinpointing me in space and time, so forcibly; with or without my allowance. I am now highlighted, always pulled out of the crowd or setting, always my name and person spoken to or talked about... my existence matters so much to something other than me, this fact allows me to justly write, knowing the written book is an acknowledgement to the mark that has been set upon me.

As for the life I lead while experiencing this, 1 out of every 3 days seems to be lived with moments so different, as least in mind, than other's have on this Earth. I know I will spiritually entwine whatever I experience, proving to the reader the why of it all, while escaping from a detailed explanation of the me outside the story. The reader must know why I am this way, why I put up with such a difference, why I sought, why I loved, why I bought my silence, and answers. There will be so many who will ask why while reading my story, the answer falls in the center of religion, my spiritual beliefs and set practices as a human with a soul.

To note, I still have not a black "sin" on me, I did go to confession last month, (I have my errors, surely not black), I have been taking note since the summer of '06. I honor God the Father, the maker of Jesus Christ, and all that is seen and unseen. I know Jesus was indeed a God, a manifestation of the true being, of the true God who reins over Heaven/Earth/and all other realms. Thank goodness Jesus was born here, died here, so I may be saved and brought to heaven in the next life. For his life and death, his choices in both, I am deeply thankful, it means to me not being dammed or lost in the next life... and living in this life with an awareness that indeed a God/MAN/HUMAN walked this Earth!!!!! How he is a guide to me, a continuous help for me, an answer to my and our questions. I feel akin to him, and as I explain more and more of myself and my consciousness, his Godliness, his written story & words, speak to my very being, to the realm I touch, and ultimately prove that such miracles, such unknown and known possibilities are true.

He is the founder of universally-known miracles. The founder of showing and explaining truths never known or properly explained. Before him God existed, as well as the dammed, but not as a man with power here on Earth, power to rule, to judge, to cure and to send to heaven. Man has always needed cures, from the illnesses of the body, to the illnesses of sin and mental wrongs; God told us since the eating of the forbidden apple in the Garden of Eden, that he wants us back~ back to the state that we were created, without illness, in perfect harmony to him. Jesus proved that a man, standing in the middle of God's created Earth, could do exactly that--- connection with the divine as we think of it now. For Jesus he was such perfection, that his whole existence was transcended with God's even before he became a man here on this Earth. I base my beliefs on the thought that God controls from the beginning to the end, every second in time he is total power, glory, and honor. His rule never stopped, never stops, and his omnipotence (the ability to know all, including what always happens in the future) co-insides with this knowledge. Jesus also had omnipotence, the ability to know the past and future. Indeed, he was a man who performed miracles on Earth knowing in that second what was and what would be; he knew he was a part of God forever and simply did as God wished. Christ's consciousness is a very interesting topic, many books have been written about it, and as I continue to write~ I know my study of it will be of great help.

Maybe the normal, working society out there has no time or patient awareness that is needed to discuss what so many skeptically argue as improbable or impossible. The miracles, the unknown, different realms, spiritual encounters, truths like time travel, parapsychology, spiritual realm communication via astroprojection or mediumship, transcendence into different consciousnesses that enable the transcended to experience a whole range of spiritual, mental, and even psychical/sensual (aka: senses) wonders, are still.... well at the very least uncelebrated. I was living and working in Seoul, as you know, while there I did indeed experience a lot spiritually, mentally, and sensually. Some of it I wrote, most is still in my head via memories. I know I must write them down, however I have a gift that will help me draw out the memories and make them momentary real on page. The gift, to explain, is that with me comes something~ not physical, yet intelligent, that can easily digress back and forth the truth of what has happened, of what took place in my past, just as if it was with me and we were having a conversation about the event. Mental discussions, what I would term this, conversations with maybe my mind, or by greater chance something else, that details the past and the truth of our experiences. It is another mind, ego, persona... and I will use this gift to write what has happened. As I grow by time; I hope the marked me is helped by the gifts I have, helped by Christ and his Holy Spirit. I hope our time together, is shared in the writing of what is true.